I began scrolling past organizations needing donations.
Thoughts in my head were, how much have I already donated? What is the tax deduction limit for a year?
I began scrolling pass one and then another until they passed through my eyes like they had nothing to do with me.
That was the problem, I became indifferent towards people in need, substituting in that time for what I needed.
I needed to see news on regular posts of family and friends.
I needed something new that would catch my interest.
I would click on the like button less often.
I would go past posts which for the longest time I had wanted to see.
I was becoming indifferent – having no particular interest or sympathy; unconcerned.
Then, I went to another app looking for posts. But I would most likely pass these posts.
Not a word. Not a phrase. Not a sentence. Just pictures brushing past my dulled mind.
Then, out of season, a Christmas song played.
Then, out of the normal, I watched a mother and her 6-year old son playing with a ball in the park across from my apartment, in a loving way.
A pleasing sight.
Then, materializing in my mind, was my sweet daughter playing her video game.
A clearly loving memory that she is here.
Then, in the background, was my darling husband exercising in the living room.
A romantic feeling stirred.
My God. . .my neighbor. . .my family. . .
My mind began to fill with many simple and pleasant memories.
They surfaced in my indifference.
I realized. . .
God seeped into my mind.
God has come once again to comfort me in my mental illness.
God has come once again to soothe my soul thoroughly.
God has come once again to encourage me to live a purposeful life.
He is never far away.
These I wanted to share with all those experiencing similar moments.
Know that God is merciful and kind.
So, every day we can say, “Thank you Lord for this beautiful day.”