I am suffering from mental illness right now.  Anger courses through my blood because my husband blew up at me.  I feel like I swallowed a rock and my diaphragm . . .I am hyperventilating.  I ruminate.  There is pain coursing right beneath my heart.

. . .This is how I feel every time, anger is projected at me.  Once upon a time, I would curse; I would bang my fist several times at a car window; I would pray; I would cry some more; I would pray to St Michael the Archangel, out aloud, in the silence of my room.  Then, I would beg the Lord to save me.  Again and again, this would happen.

Today, I chose to write to you because this is not my story.  My story is one where I chose to FORGIVE the anger displaced on me, because the Lord is merciful.  My tears may well up again and I cry, “Lord, have mercy on me for I am a sinner.”

I felt some peace but still I have not FORGIVEn.  Then, PEACE is what I chose to focus on, so I forgave.  Why not choose the kindness of a stranger giving you your favorite tall cup of slices of orange green tea?  Why not choose to pray?  Why not choose to help a man who needs a bike to ride home?  Why not choose to stop eating that slice of pizza?

Now, when anger is displaced on me, I choose to FORGIVE.  That is my story of the coming year – the year of FORGIVEness and maybe, grace.